I Need Your Advice About a Coworker

“Pate, can you please add this to your blog? I’ve been dealing with this for a while and I don’t know what to do. I’d like to see if anyone would comment and give some advice. I want to be anonymous.”

I work in the retail business and have been for a few years. A friend of mine asked me to help get her a job where I work. Immediately I knew this was the best thing ever because I didn’t have any friends at work. I love my time with her and I don’t see her as much as I used to. She eventually was hired. We don’t work every shift together but we talked more because of catching up and talked about some things work related as she was being hired. Now, she’s been here for a while and she’s not the person I thought she was. I regret helping her get hired. Our relationship has become awkward, or at least awkward for me, because no one at work likes her and to be honest it’s because she’s not a good employee or a good coworker. I’ve started to not like who she is.

Im curious if there’s any way I can talk to her and say “you’re embarrassing me because I helped you get a job here and I don’t like who you are once I’ve been around you so much” without being mean. Or do I not say anything? I’m not her boss, but I helped her get a job and we were friends just a short while ago.

I will look and see in the comments to see if anyone answers on what they would do.


“And You Call Yourself a Christian?”

Being a Christian in some countries will get you imprisoned, tortured, beaten and even beheaded. Yes, beheaded. Like, cut your head off because you are a Christian. People all around the world hide their religion and worship in secret because they are scared of the consequences. Life in America is completely different. Being Christian in American means you’re safe from all of those things and you don’t have to hide your religious practices. That alone is enough to be thankful for. I shouldn’t even write anymore because that is enough to be thankful for. We are safe from those terrible things that happen in other countries. You won’t be thrown in jail for your religion.

I can, however, tell you what you are not safe from. You’re not safe from other Americans judging you or throwing your religion around when they feel like taking a jab at you.

When you openly talk about going to church and being Christian, you open yourself up to some ridiculous comments from others who want to use religion as a way to shame you, twist words, pressure you to do things, and try and make you feel bad for not giving them what they’re asking for. “You’re some kind of Christian, aren’t you?!?” It spews from mouths without hesitation at any available opportunity when the one speaking feels like they can put you down for not doing something they’d like. I do some volunteer work and you’d be surprised at some things I’ve been told there and even outside of there.

Can you pay my light bill? No? I thought you were Christian. Can I borrow $1,000 until payday? No? Wow. Some Christian you are. Will you take this lopsided trade that only benefits me? You can’t because it’s not fair? I thought you were a Christian, but I guess not.

By now, you’ve either said these words or had these words said to you. But why? Do people think that’s really going to work in their favor? Yes, I can help you, maybe not in the capacity that you’d wanted. One things for sure, after a comment like that is made, I’m glad I didn’t waste my time helping someone like that.

It doesn’t happen often but it happens. I’ve watch it happen to others too so I know I’m not alone. By all means, take a jab at me to make yourself feel better because you didn’t get everything you wanted. Just don’t cut off my head.

Don’t be Elle’s Daughter

I hadn’t planned on writing about this until I read more about this event this morning. I wake up at the latest around 6:30am daily. By now if I haven’t learned how to sleep in, it’s just never going to happen. I, like most of the population, reach for my phone shortly after I wake up. Everyone else in the house learned how to sleep in, so I read the news, watch sports highlights, then scroll through Facebook quietly. I was reading an article about an incident that took place on March 19, 2018 in Tempe, Arizona. A 49 year old woman, “Elle”, was killed walking across the street when she was hit by a self driving Uber car. Uber is a very popular company everywhere but in Alabama. Governor Ivy did pass some legislation earlier allowing Uber and other companies to move in to Alabama.

To quickly sum up Uber, it’s a taxi service where you can use an app to request a ride and someone local will pick you up in their car to take you. You pay through the app, rate the driver, and use Uber again when needed. Basically anyone could make extra money by being a taxi driver. Around here we rarely see a taxi, maybe some here and there in Gulf Shores and Orange Beach. Back to Arizona. I had already seen this on the news that an Uber self driving car had hit someone crossing the street going 40 mph and that the self driving car program had been suspended in the United States. What I read new today that shocked me caused me to write this. 49 year old Elle was homeless. Elle was walking her bike across the street when she was hit by the self driving Uber car. The article says that Elle was on the right track to getting her life back together and getting off the streets and that she had been dealing with family and financial troubles that led her to be homeless. What I read next angered me. “Uber has settled out of court with Elle’s daughter and her husband for millions of dollars.”

What? You mean the daughter of Elle and her husband have been awarded millions of dollars after her mother who she allowed to be homeless was hit by a car? After her mother who was dealing with “family and financial struggles” was homeless and living on the street the daughter and son-in-law go after Uber for millions of dollars! Wow. I couldn’t imagine my mother being homeless. I would like to think my mother would never be homeless because of lot of bad things would have to happen to her to reach that point but even if all those things happened, my mother would live with me before she was homeless. Elle’s daughter doesn’t feel the same way. Elle was allowed to be homeless and was killed crossing the street and now the daughter who never fixed the family problems and who allowed the mother to be homeless will soon be a millionaire. Two wrongs don’t make a right. When you set your priorities in life, and most people put family toward the top, you act accordingly to take care of your priorities. You either fix your family problem, take your mother in when she’s facing homelessness, or move out on the street with her to protect her. You do not let a family member become homeless. If your family is not your priority, you don’t collect millions of dollars after an incident to your family member. It’s that simple. Lesson learned today. Don’t be Elle’s daughter.


This isn’t my first blog, but it’s my first blog on my own website. A few months ago I figured I’d better lock down patecardwell.com before either A) someone else named Pate Cardwell got the domain name or B) someone bought the site name before I could then wanted to charge me an outrageous price to buy it from them. People have been known to buy domain names of either famous people’s names, or company names, then when said person or company goes to buy a website, that site name is taken. The owner of the site jacks up the price and sells it to that person or business. The most recognizable case is a from a guy, Mike Mann, who actually bought over 14,000 domain names in a 24 hour period and then sold them all for more as people wanted to buy those names.

That’s what I see this site being about. Not domain names or buying and selling. People. People I’ve met and maybe even people I’ve never met and only read about. People I’ve learned from. Good people, bad people. It doesn’t matter.

I’m going to ask others to help contribute blogs to this page as well. We’ll see how it goes.

I’ll post something soon. Thanks for the support.